Beards, reputation, incomprehension.

I reflected the other day about whether my beardedness led to my reputation as somebody who reads things. After all, St. Kosmas of Aetolia, whose feast was last Wednesday, said, "You, young men, honor those with beards. And if there is a man of thirty with a beard and one of fifty, or sixty, or a hundred who shaves, place the one with the beard above the one who shaves, in Church as well as at the table." My bearded state must have confused them and led them to believe I possessed great wisdom.

However, this conclusion must be false. I am only around during summers and they know me better as beardless: I kept clean-shaven for a job two years ago and last year I shaved my head. Further, in such states, I participated in book discussions where my ignorance of said books must have been manifest. Merely appearing with a beard one year later should not be enough to snow over their perception of my ignorance. I grant that my beard is marvellous and stunning, but not that stunning.

I remain perplexed.

NEW TOPIC: If meth is anything like the Sudafed it's made from, I'm so very sorry for the people who are addicted. The 'fed trips me up major and it's horrible. It's almost as bad as the cold itself, but it gets me through the day. I should switch to something drowsifying, I don't need to be awake all day and I rather enjoy sleep [oh, yeah, and Sudafed induces horrible dreams, not as bad as food poisoning dreams, but they're also about Serbia]. The country has become a Walker Percy novel, complete with appropriate setting. Anyways: Sudafed, that and coffee, they mess me up. I think I might not be suited for stimulants, for every other drug, I'm like a bear.

LACK OF UNDERSTANDING: For the past few days, I have read texts and not understood them. I don't even remember them. Short texts, even. I just don't get them.

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I'M DOING HERE: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Self-explanatory. Thinking about what I am and what I do. Have been talking, as well, with some old friends about what I'm suited for. In the meantime: take GRE, learn Greek, smoke rocks.

I'VE BEEN READING "NIHILISM" AGAIN: Link on the right. I've been understanding the bits I slog through, though. But I've read it before and it's so me.

THE LINK BETWEEN THEM: ???